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10 Ways Toxic Bosses Drive Their Best Employees Away

by

Employees don’t leave companies, they leave bosses.

It may sound cliché, but it’s true. A 2015 Gallup study surveying over 7,200 adults concluded that approximately half of them had left a job at some point to escape a manager. And those were the ones who were able to get out. How many employees become actively disengaged at work due to a toxic boss?

Losing a top notch employee isn’t cheap. A study by the Center for American Progress found that the cost of replacing an employee varies between 16% of salary for low-earning positions to a staggering 213% of salary for skilled high-earning positions. Definitely not chump change, and a clear indication that an organization’s best strategy should be to proactively retain talent.

Managers play a critical role in this and it’s important to understand how negative behaviors can drive their best employees away.

10 Ways Toxic Bosses Drive Their Best Employees Away

They don’t support.

People want to feel that their managers have their backs. They want confidence that their ideas are propelled forward and that they are defended when naysayers speak negatively. But toxic bosses see employees as disposable, and only there to serve them. They feel little obligation to them and avoid taking a stand to support them unless there is a direct personal benefit.

They undermine.

Even worse than a lack of support is the manager who actively thwarts the efforts of her subordinates. She may, for example, reward a team member who her subordinate has placed on corrective action. Or she may publicly ridicule ideas proposed by an employee during a meeting. Instances such as these tell the subordinate in no uncertain terms that his manager is trying to discredit him.

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They aren’t transparent.

Toxic managers revel in secrecy and hidden agendas. They hold “meetings after the meeting” where their true opinions surface, often in direct conflict with what was expressed during the meeting itself. They withhold information and expect subordinates to do the same. Employees are constantly wondering what they are allowed to share and how much information isn’t shared with them. When people have to fight for knowledge, they soon start looking elsewhere where they can feel more in the know.

They compete with subordinates.

Strong managers understand that their teams drive their successes. They encourage and celebrate employee wins, which in turn keeps employees motivated to continue striving to achieve. Toxic managers instead see talented subordinates as threats. They worry that an employee will promote to their level or even replace them, and hold the unfounded belief that this would somehow diminish their own influence. This leads them to play the blame game when errors occur, or take credit when things go well. Neither bodes well for the manager-subordinate relationship.

They are too focused on status.

People want to know that their work speaks for itself. That while office politics always lurk in the background, ultimately quality work and strong ethics will always be rewarded. Weak managers see it differently – they feel that status and position on the office hierarchy are tantamount to success. These bosses will discount the feedback of lower-ranked employees while fast-tracking ideas from higher-ranked employees based on position alone. When questioned, they say things like “how dare he speak to someone at my level this way!” This leads to a lack of trust and a feeling of helplessness as subordinates realize they will never be able to influence change.

They are dishonest.

Honesty and integrity are critical to any relationship, the manager and subordinate relationship included. People can forgive a couple of white lies or a minor slip-up. But once a manager has been found to be lying on various occasions – unapologetically – his credibility is shot with subordinates.

They don’t respect employees’ time.

Everyone’s time is valuable, regardless of position. When a manager regularly contacts employees outside of business hours, keeps them on calls beyond end of business day, and cancels meetings last minute, she is messaging that her employees’ time is not important. Even more, she is communicating an expectation that her employees be available at her whim 24/7, leading to higher stress levels and uncertainty in her employees.

They are constantly testing.

Nobody wants to walk on eggshells all the time. A reasonable amount of employee testing is to be expected in the beginning stages of the manager and subordinate relationship, but if that testing continues indefinitely it leads to tension and distrust. Managers who criticize after the fact instead of coaching immediately, or who say things like “I wanted to see what you would say/do,” encourage resentment and uncertainty in employees who want to succeed.

They don’t respond well to feedback or concerns.

Communication is critical to any successful relationship. People want to feel that they can talk openly with their managers, whether or not there is agreement. Strong managers encourage and even solicit feedback, while weak bosses discourage it or respond negatively. The worst managers will turn conversations around, using them as opportunities to point out weaknesses in their employees instead – taking the focus off themselves.

They constantly change direction.

People thrive when they know what to expect. Flexibility is good, but toxic managers often change course on a dime. Because they are followers more so than real leaders, they don’t hesitate to change direction on the whims of superiors. When they refuse to advocate or provide constructive feedback against unnecessary change, they lose respect and credibility.

The bad news is that toxic management often results in the loss of the best (versus mediocre) employees. Why? Simple. The best have options – and they know it.

The good news is that toxic management behaviors can be easily spotted and corrected – if the organization actively discourages this type of culture. Team leadership and personnel management are learned skills that can be reinforced with regular training, coaching, and by example. Companies with long tenured employees have mastered the retention equation by consistently demonstrating respect, recognition, and flexibility towards employees who, in turn, are happy to stick around and drive towards success.

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Filed Under: Earning, Money Matters Tagged With: boss, boss changing direction, boss doesn't want feedback, bosses who are too focused on status, bosses who test, career, dishonest boss, dishonest manager, don't trust manager, employee engagement, employee retention, how bosses drive employees away, how managers drive employees away, how to retain strong employees, job, lying boss, lying manager, management, manager is testing, manager responds negatively to feedback, managers who are obsessed with status, managers who aren't transparent, managers who compete with subordinates, managers who don't support, managers who undermine, people management skills, people skills, toxic boss, toxic manager, toxic superior, why employees leave companies, why employees leave jobs, why the best employees leave

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Comments

  1. Joe says

    October 21, 2016 at 9:15 pm

    You article is right on target? Some additional things that characterize poor managers are:

    They play favorites and play people against each other to get information and more control over what employees say and do.

    They also tend to micromanage their employees and harp on minor mistakes to boost their ego and diminish their employees and create an office atmosphere of fear and loathing.

    They are typically poor trainers and tend to be inpatient and can never fit your training or technical support needs into their schedule.

    They tend to try to delegate everything they can to subordinates at a level that undermines the ability of employees to function in a workplace.

    They tend to be hypercritical when someone missing work or is late for work, even when it is a infrequent behavior. However, they come and go when they please and tend to be sick more than subordinates and take frequent and long vacations.

    • Faye says

      October 21, 2016 at 10:31 pm

      Great points – especially the first two about playing people against each other and harping on minor mistakes. These types of behaviors can really erode an employee’s motivation and engagement over time.

    • Julie says

      October 31, 2016 at 7:52 pm

      Joe:

      Do you work in my office? Wow, sounds so familiar.

      Faye:

      Yours and Joe’s are some of the reasons I am thinking of leaving my job, and was reading your column about resigning.

      I feel undermined no matter what I do, and nothing is never good enough. Transparency is not practiced, only some of us are on call 24/7, others are able to ignore calls and never reprimanded for it, there are favorite employees and favors to some that we are not aware of, no time given to new employees for good training, not enough time in between jobs (construction type company) to take proper care of equipment which results in breakdowns on projects- it’s an embarrassment.
      In addition to the above, I am told to “act happier” as others are either gone for the day or online shopping (I also get to accept the daily deliveries). It just feels so wrong, but I am not one to give up so I keep sticking it out for the few people here who see what goes on and care. It does make me yearn for old jobs I had where we worked together so well. I am having a hard time finding places like that, and would definitely take a pay cut for less stress and to feel valued.

      • Faye says

        November 1, 2016 at 5:38 pm

        Julie, I am so sorry that you’re going through that right now! That sounds like an awful environment to work in and, understandably, you must be finding it hard to stay engaged. I completely understand what you’re saying about taking a pay cut to be happier – ultimately, that’s what it’s all about, right? As long as the bills are paid, a little less money for more mental sanity sounds like a fair trade-off to me. Are you actively looking for a better environment? Is there someone you can talk to at work about the environment that you’re in, and possibly making some changes?

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Hi, I’m Faye!

Mommy. Former Corporate American. New Freelancer/Risk-Taker. Foodie. Traveler. Spiritualist. Simple Living Learner.

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